A poem depicting the absurdity in comparing ourselves with others

Journey On…
Written by Elizabeth A. Van Cleve

Don’t ever say-
Because I’m here
You shouldn’t be there
or
Because you’re there
I shouldn’t be here
It makes no sense

Would you ever say-
Because I am twenty
You shouldn’t be two
Because I love red
You shouldn’t love blue
or
Because you’re a teacher
It’s not okay I’m a student
Because I’m carefree
It”s not okay that you are prudent
Because I’m in the east
It’s not okay you’re in the west
Because you do it better
It’s not okay I do my best
Because I see the sunset
It’s not okay you see it rise
or
Because I slipped and stumbled
It’s not okay that you were wise?

See how ridiculous
this thinking seems to be?
When I cannot be you
And you cannot be me!

Do you ever say-
Because you’re over there
I should not be here
or
Because I’m over here
You should not be there?
It makes no sense

One should never say-
Because my skin is black
Your skin should not be white
Because I think it’s wrong
You cannot be right
Because my body’s whole
It’s not okay you cannot walk
Because I know the language
It’s not okay you cannot talk
Because I am straight
It’s not okay that you are gay
Because you have to work
It’s not okay that I should play
or
Because you are happy
It’s not okay that I am sad
Because they got it good
It’s not okay I’ve got it bad
Because you are you
It’s not okay that I am me
Because I have a vision
It’s not okay that you do not see

Because I am here
It’s not okay that you are there
or
Because you are there
It’s not okay that I am here
It makes no sense

Here’s what we should say-

I am here, and
It’s okay that you are there
You are there, and
It’s okay that I am here
I see one way
Because I am here
You see another way
Because you are there
Your journeys yours
My journeys mine
I may be twenty
You may be ninety-nine
You may be a woman
I may be a man
Another may be both
By what they understand
You may live in India
I may live in France
I may be very timid
You may love to dance

One thing is for certain
It’s foolish that we fight
And say you must be wrong
Because I think I’m right
It is what it is, and
We are where we are
And from where I started
I’ve come thus far
So journey on my friend
I wish you all the best
As you travel east, and
I travel west

Cheerio!

What is RIGHT with Me!?

improved_compressed

When someone else comes against us, discourages us, rejects us, misunderstands us, makes fun of us, breaks up with us, or is just plain mean to us, after grappling through the initial blow and shock of what just happened, more often than not, we start to ask ourselves, “What is wrong with me?”

Lets put the breaks on this question right here and now with the simple answer:

NOTHING!!!!

We are not even asking the right question,

“What is wrong with THEM?” 

After all, they are the one with the issue- not you.

They are the one responsible for how they feel and react or respond to ANYTHING in life- including you.

Its time to dump the question of what’s wrong with me and replace it with an empowering, positive question;

“What is RIGHT with me?”

In fact, if you tend to look for what is wrong with you, start making the question “What is RIGHT with me?” a regular habit.

Smile at yourself in the mirror. Ignore all those ugly negative voices that keep trying to pull you into self-condemnation.

Tell that beautiful, one of kind person in the mirror that you are his/her BEST friend and you are going to start telling him/her all the reasons why!

“What is RIGHT with me?”

Now that is a question worth meditating on and answering!!!

Have an awesome day!

 

How to say NO nicely

 

Just say no

“NO” tends to have such a negative stigma to it, and yet it is possibly the most powerful word in our vocabulary when we learn to use it regularly in our lives. You see in this world of duality we have both YES and NO-  and together they are called CHOICE! As we move toward wholeness and well-being, it is imperative that we become very cognizant of our choices and choose deliberately and wisely those things which heal, uplift, bring peace, love, joy, happiness, and fun- and sometimes those things that are difficult in order to help ourselves or others out of loneliness, despair or even danger.

“NO” needs to be heavily cultivated in our lives in order to make room to say YES to our true desires, wants and needs. It’s important to decipher accurately what you are responsible for and what you are not responsible for. In order to bring NO into your comfort zone, you have to come to the realization that:

  • You are not here to be the savior of the world.
  • You are not the rescuer of other peoples lives.
  • You are not responsible for other peoples choices, other peoples feelings or emotions, other peoples opinions, and other peoples journey here.

We can call this list false responsibility. “Other people” includes family and close friends. Even our children, once they are of age to make their own decisions independently, we need to let them go and make their own choices and be responsible for their own journey, feelings, mistakes and progress. We gave them all we were able and now its time for them to journey on and learn as we have learned- through trial and error, and through all of life experiences- the good and the difficult.

The next time you are asked to be somewhere, to bring something, to do something, to go somewhere, to help out, care for, etc… weather asked verbally or by assumption, if you are not in the habit of saying no when you need to, then do not answer right away. Take time consider what your responsibilities truly are, whether or not you want to say yes and why. Think about the obligation that saying yes will entail and if you have the energy, time, strength or desire to make that obligation.

When you say NO, you need not offer an explanation. I bite my tongue, if needs be, to keep from explaining myself to others. I don’t need to do that.

*Just remember that once you give a reason why you are saying no, that opens the door for argument and for the other person to persuade you otherwise. When you are endeavoring to build healthy boundaries “NO” is one of your best friends!!!

saying no